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Disrespectful kids can turn a household upside down.

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Proverbs 31: Encouragement for Today


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If you are wondering what to do with a disrespectful kid, you are not alone.


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Lots of us face this challenge. In fact, nearly all families deal with disrespectful kids from time to time. It's the nature of raising little human beings into big human beings.

However, no one wants the disrespect to continue. That brings us to our starting point in answering the question "what to do with a disrespectful kid?"

1. The disrespect must stop.

This seems obvious, doesn't it? Yet many of us parents tolerate disrespectful kids while hoping the problem will go away.

Stop tolerating the disrespectful behavior by...
  • having privileges cease.
  • clarifying boundaries.
  • enforcing consequences.
  • and above all, don't back down!

A history of unchallenged disrespect can lead to an out of control child.

You don't want that and neither does your growing child.


2. Ask yourself where the disrespect is coming from.

  • Why is your child angry?
  • Why is your child defiant?
  • Is your kid hurtful to himself or others?
  • Is your kid feeling isolated in some way?
Disrespect is a power play. You cannot have a healthy relationship with someone who is regularly disrespectful.

Need more about this topic? Read this article. Kids Who are Verbally Abusive: The Creation of a Defiant Child

3. Disrespectful kids and consequences.

  • Remember, discipline, not necessarily punishment, is what you are striving for. There is a difference! Discipline is about leading your child into adulthood, one step at a time. Punishment is often an angry reaction to the behavior of the moment. You can certainly instill fear into your child, but what you are aiming for is respect! That requires discipline and leadership.

  • Fashion your consequences as much as possible so they are the natural outcome of the disrespectful behavior. Do not punish to hurt your child! He (and you) are already hurting. Your goal is to develop and train your child. Use consequences that teach and are meaningful.

4. What to do with a disrespectful kid who gets the disrespect from his environment?

As much as possible, remove the environment until he can respond with better self-control.
  • Turn off the TV. Read books together.
  • Get to know your child's friends. Steer her towards positive peers.
  • Moniter the movies, games and music your child is exposed to. Explain that a respectful home is important and you won't tolerate a culture of disrespect. Then stick to it.
Discuss, as an ongoing, age-appropriate conversation, the values and morals you feel are important and want to pass onto your young child. Teach and grow together!

Disrespect is a BIG deal to me, as a mom. If you want to learn more about my strategies, sign up for my ezine "I Love My Child" (see sign up box above). See you there!

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More mothering articles for you to enjoy...

Dealing with Disrespectful Children

How to Handle Disrespectful Teenagers




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